Written by Doug Dobransky, Autumn Sister is a touching memoir devoted to his sister's struggle with cancer. What follows is Autumn Sister's introduction:
EVERYONE PRESENTLY LIVING IS DYING. Some of us sooner than others, and few of us know when. Having been a free-spirited, hedonistic, chronic womanizer all of my adult life, then suddenly becoming a caretaking warrior in the battle against level 3 breast cancer would have never prepared me for the year of hell, walking hand in hand with the sister I loved, through high-dose radiation, chemotherapy, profound radical surgery, and days and days of Bed Bath and Beyond.
My sister, Cheryl Ann, pointed out to me that my shower curtain, dish rack, bath tub, bed clothing, kitchen floor, and countless other bachelor maladies desperately needed revision and supervision. I had no idea. And why would I? Domestic makeover was invading my space like a flesh-eating virus and all I was trying to do was save her life.
By far, the most difficult thing I’ve ever done was to stop my life
of pleasure and adventure and try helping a courageous, young forty-four-year-old Director of Human Resources save her life. Life as she
knew it stopped in February 2001 when word came to her that the
lump she found was the enemy and needed killing. The chances for
such a case were normally fair to good, but as her luck went during the
entire ordeal, the scan reader that day was not at the top of her game…
must have had a late night. By June, four months later, the cancer was
racing and a desperate new plan was needed. Misdiagnosis sucks.
Leaving home suddenly to move out of state with just a suitcase
to fight cancer is not an easy thing. Not even a good in-flight movie
could distract anyone from that. Cheryl Ann flew to Los Angeles from
Youngstown, Ohio, to move in with me to begin one last chance in
Level B of the 200 Building at the UCLA Medical Center. They were
kind enough to take her case after my meetings and pleas. Our thanks
went out to them at UCLA, and the war began.
Over the months, we lived as two people might. Treatment every
day. Sickness and fear most of the time. Talks and more talks. Living
difficulties…money, rationalizing, traffic, pain, tears, and bewilderment
under it all. Above facing all those things came one larger revelation:
a human love was born. She and I laughed at cancer in the face. Our
daily chronicle kept laughs and tears flowing and from it came family
resolution, divine purpose, respect, and fulfillment. Facing death did
not take us over. Love took us over. Family love and brotherly love. I
was lucky to be my sister’s hero. She always told me that, and trying
so hard to be the brother she always thought I was took me to the
very limits of my being. I nearly cracked numerous times. But month
after month, something happened. What eventually emerged was one
final feeling of purpose in life. I finally figured it out. I was kept alive
in Vietnam long ago to maybe do this one thing. Give myself away to
another person in time of need. I have not had a more meaningful assignment,
nor have I had a more fulfilling conclusion. It was my gift,
and as unlikely a guy as I was to become a caretaker, I am the one who
was rewarded. I had real purpose. That is a gift.
Laughter saved us. I loved to make her laugh and in the depths of
despair, we kicked inflammatory breast cancer in the teeth, if only to
laugh for a few minutes at a time. Autumn Sister records the weeks and
months during the days of Cheryl Ann Dobransky Kraynik and tells
the true story of a brother and sister, a husband, a son, and a family,
who made a courageous attempt at exhibiting dignity, humor, strength,
and love as so many millions of families must do in the drama that is
cancer. It was my great honor to watch a gracious young sister “walk
point” during the long months of torture, and it is her beautiful soul
that remains in me always. During the months, I saw thousands of
people brave illness and I now love the human sprit more than ever.
There must be a great waiting room for all of them somewhere up
high. I am now fearless to find out. I thank them all for that.
My intention is to open up our lives in hopes of easing and helping
others who find themselves in this fight. By our daily living and
constant attempt to disrespect cancer, Cheryl and I stole nights and
hours from the rudeness that is life interrupted. We laughed and cried
and learned that there are still ways to stand taller when life is pushing
down. There are ways to still smile at beauty and love right in the middle
of third-degree radiation burns. There is enormous healing gained
by putting old family pain aside and seeing loved ones for whom they
are. In Autumn Sister, it was my hope to save my own sanity during
the hundreds of days by writing of the comedy in hospital OR’s family
invasions, or my bachelor ways and corresponding with those back
home. It was my need to let her read a daily chronicle each night at my
computer in hopes that I would hear hysterical laughter coming out
of her. For just those few moments, you see, she was not sick, and that
was something I could actually do against cancer. I cured cancer in her
for moments at a time, and that was my something.
“Remember,” I told her, “the first three letters in funeral are
F-U-N, so that is what we are going to do.” The hell with death and
dying. “You’re not dead yet, so today we laugh.” And that we did.
Doug Dobransky has been a Hollywood photographer for the past 28 years, working within the industries of entertainment, motion pictures, advertising, politics, sports, and music. His extensive list of clients includes Marlon Brando, Mickey Rooney, James Coburn, Juliette Lewis, Dennis Haysbert, Muhammad Ali, Mel Allen, Ted Danson, Shia LeBeouf, Stanley Clarke, Bradd Pitt, Dee Wallace, Quincy Jones, Lindsay Wagner, David Hassellhoff, and countless others. He is a decorated veteran of the Vietnam War, and a former AVP in Los Angeles banking system. Doug is a native of Butler, Pennsylvania and Youngstown, Ohio, moving to Los Angeles in 1969.
Autumn Sister is one of the newest books published by Mill City Press. It will be available for purchase soon! Find it at http://www.autumnsister.com. To find out how you can have your book published by Mill City Press, click on the link above.
EVERYONE PRESENTLY LIVING IS DYING. Some of us sooner than others, and few of us know when. Having been a free-spirited, hedonistic, chronic womanizer all of my adult life, then suddenly becoming a caretaking warrior in the battle against level 3 breast cancer would have never prepared me for the year of hell, walking hand in hand with the sister I loved, through high-dose radiation, chemotherapy, profound radical surgery, and days and days of Bed Bath and Beyond.
My sister, Cheryl Ann, pointed out to me that my shower curtain, dish rack, bath tub, bed clothing, kitchen floor, and countless other bachelor maladies desperately needed revision and supervision. I had no idea. And why would I? Domestic makeover was invading my space like a flesh-eating virus and all I was trying to do was save her life.
By far, the most difficult thing I’ve ever done was to stop my life
of pleasure and adventure and try helping a courageous, young forty-four-year-old Director of Human Resources save her life. Life as she
knew it stopped in February 2001 when word came to her that the
lump she found was the enemy and needed killing. The chances for
such a case were normally fair to good, but as her luck went during the
entire ordeal, the scan reader that day was not at the top of her game…
must have had a late night. By June, four months later, the cancer was
racing and a desperate new plan was needed. Misdiagnosis sucks.
Leaving home suddenly to move out of state with just a suitcase
to fight cancer is not an easy thing. Not even a good in-flight movie
could distract anyone from that. Cheryl Ann flew to Los Angeles from
Youngstown, Ohio, to move in with me to begin one last chance in
Level B of the 200 Building at the UCLA Medical Center. They were
kind enough to take her case after my meetings and pleas. Our thanks
went out to them at UCLA, and the war began.
Over the months, we lived as two people might. Treatment every
day. Sickness and fear most of the time. Talks and more talks. Living
difficulties…money, rationalizing, traffic, pain, tears, and bewilderment
under it all. Above facing all those things came one larger revelation:
a human love was born. She and I laughed at cancer in the face. Our
daily chronicle kept laughs and tears flowing and from it came family
resolution, divine purpose, respect, and fulfillment. Facing death did
not take us over. Love took us over. Family love and brotherly love. I
was lucky to be my sister’s hero. She always told me that, and trying
so hard to be the brother she always thought I was took me to the
very limits of my being. I nearly cracked numerous times. But month
after month, something happened. What eventually emerged was one
final feeling of purpose in life. I finally figured it out. I was kept alive
in Vietnam long ago to maybe do this one thing. Give myself away to
another person in time of need. I have not had a more meaningful assignment,
nor have I had a more fulfilling conclusion. It was my gift,
and as unlikely a guy as I was to become a caretaker, I am the one who
was rewarded. I had real purpose. That is a gift.
Laughter saved us. I loved to make her laugh and in the depths of
despair, we kicked inflammatory breast cancer in the teeth, if only to
laugh for a few minutes at a time. Autumn Sister records the weeks and
months during the days of Cheryl Ann Dobransky Kraynik and tells
the true story of a brother and sister, a husband, a son, and a family,
who made a courageous attempt at exhibiting dignity, humor, strength,
and love as so many millions of families must do in the drama that is
cancer. It was my great honor to watch a gracious young sister “walk
point” during the long months of torture, and it is her beautiful soul
that remains in me always. During the months, I saw thousands of
people brave illness and I now love the human sprit more than ever.
There must be a great waiting room for all of them somewhere up
high. I am now fearless to find out. I thank them all for that.
My intention is to open up our lives in hopes of easing and helping
others who find themselves in this fight. By our daily living and
constant attempt to disrespect cancer, Cheryl and I stole nights and
hours from the rudeness that is life interrupted. We laughed and cried
and learned that there are still ways to stand taller when life is pushing
down. There are ways to still smile at beauty and love right in the middle
of third-degree radiation burns. There is enormous healing gained
by putting old family pain aside and seeing loved ones for whom they
are. In Autumn Sister, it was my hope to save my own sanity during
the hundreds of days by writing of the comedy in hospital OR’s family
invasions, or my bachelor ways and corresponding with those back
home. It was my need to let her read a daily chronicle each night at my
computer in hopes that I would hear hysterical laughter coming out
of her. For just those few moments, you see, she was not sick, and that
was something I could actually do against cancer. I cured cancer in her
for moments at a time, and that was my something.
“Remember,” I told her, “the first three letters in funeral are
F-U-N, so that is what we are going to do.” The hell with death and
dying. “You’re not dead yet, so today we laugh.” And that we did.
Doug Dobransky has been a Hollywood photographer for the past 28 years, working within the industries of entertainment, motion pictures, advertising, politics, sports, and music. His extensive list of clients includes Marlon Brando, Mickey Rooney, James Coburn, Juliette Lewis, Dennis Haysbert, Muhammad Ali, Mel Allen, Ted Danson, Shia LeBeouf, Stanley Clarke, Bradd Pitt, Dee Wallace, Quincy Jones, Lindsay Wagner, David Hassellhoff, and countless others. He is a decorated veteran of the Vietnam War, and a former AVP in Los Angeles banking system. Doug is a native of Butler, Pennsylvania and Youngstown, Ohio, moving to Los Angeles in 1969.
Autumn Sister is one of the newest books published by Mill City Press. It will be available for purchase soon! Find it at http://www.autumnsister.com. To find out how you can have your book published by Mill City Press, click on the link above.
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